Bibliophile. Somewhat of an alcoholic. Extremely stubborn.
fishslut:

of-the-yellow-ajah:

unbuttonedinawood:

i never thought i’d write the words “deeply evil carpet” but. seriously. what a deeply evil carpet that is.

And what you should do is to put this over an actual trap, like a hole in the floor so people will be like “Oh ha ha ha that’s soooo funny, it’s a rug!” And then fall through it. 

are you satan

fishslut:

of-the-yellow-ajah:

unbuttonedinawood:

i never thought i’d write the words “deeply evil carpet” but. seriously. what a deeply evil carpet that is.

And what you should do is to put this over an actual trap, like a hole in the floor so people will be like “Oh ha ha ha that’s soooo funny, it’s a rug!” And then fall through it. 

are you satan

(Source: jrcbouillabaisse, via fake-mermaid)

Notes
294612
Posted
3 hours ago
me:whats your opinion on tampons
little brother:they're little fuzzy sticks on strings
me:then you are ultimately more mature than most boys
little brother:why
me:for some reason tampons are gross and taboo just cuz they go in a vagina
little brother:well so does a penis and boys never stop talking about those
me:
little brother:
me:that is a fantastic point
Notes
508529
Posted
4 hours ago

krisjener:

can we talk about the lyrics in lorde’s song 400 lux???

image

????

(Source: krispymeme, via bastille)

Notes
248475
Posted
4 hours ago
awwww-cute:

After a long exciting hike, Rocky was just too tired to go on. No problem

awwww-cute:

After a long exciting hike, Rocky was just too tired to go on. No problem

(via zairabynature)

Notes
9411
Posted
5 hours ago
35-24-35:

<blockquote>
<pre><strong><a href=”http://35-24-35.tumblr.com” target=”_blank”>35-24-35</a»

35-24-35:

<blockquote>
<pre><strong><a href=”http://35-24-35.tumblr.com” target=”_blank”>35-24-35</a»

Notes
3184
Posted
5 hours ago
Cop:Have you been drinking?
Me:I been drankin'
Cop:Surfbort
Me:Surfbort
Notes
175355
Posted
5 hours ago

highbrowandbeard:

THIS IS MY NEW FAVOURITE LINE

(Source: logotv, via ancora-una-volta)

Notes
418800
Posted
5 hours ago

bricesander:

Nicole Richie filling out an online dating profile for her friend Erin. 

(via bastille)

Notes
116910
Posted
5 hours ago

Tyler Kent White  (via nyu-tah)

(Source: allwereallyneedisweed, via ancora-una-volta)

Never apologize for burning too brightly or collapsing into yourself every night. That is how galaxies are made.
Notes
48395
Posted
5 hours ago

zohbugg:

if I ever fall into a coma someone please come secretly tweeze my eyebrows so I can make all the nurses hella jealous of my unconscious eyebrow game. 

(via imhislittlewhiskeygirl)

Notes
32347
Posted
1 day ago

The morning after

toaworminhorseradish:

I like my sheets to be stained
With blood sweat and tears
I like the room to be heavy
With the sweet and musky scent
Of our inclined pleasure

Notes
4
Posted
1 day ago

ifwefallonemoretime:

theorginalmiddlechild:

helenas-hood:

Friendly reminder that yesterday when my mom took me to Walmart she left me alone in the toilet paper section and this guy started hitting on me and I said “Sorry, I’m a lesbian.” and he was like “Oh my god I’m so sorry I thought you were a boy.”

Soda just spewed out my nose

THAT WAS A PLOT TWIST

(Source: mintyboob, via underthessheets)

Notes
563947
Posted
1 day ago

Arctic Monkeys (Arabella)

(Source: sposera, via underthessheets)

It’s an exploration, she’s made of outer space
And her lips are like the galaxy’s edge
And her kiss the colour of a constellation falling into place
Notes
3901
Posted
1 day ago
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